CHAPTER I — START IN LIFE was born in the year 1632 , in , of , though not of , being , who settled first at .
got a good estate by merchandise , and leaving off trade , lived afterwards at , from whence had married , whose relations were named , in , and from whom was called ; but , by the usual corruption of words in , are now called — nay call and write name — ; and so always called .
had , was and was killed at the battle near against .
What became of never knew , any more than or knew what became of .
Being and not bred to any trade , head began to be filled very early with rambling thoughts .
, had given a competent share of learning , as far as house-education and generally go , and designed for the law ; but would be satisfied with nothing but going to ; and inclination to this led so strongly against the will , nay , the commands of , and against all the entreaties and persuasions of and other , that there seemed to be something fatal in that propensity of nature , tending directly to the life of misery which was to befall .
, , gave serious and excellent counsel against what foresaw was design .
called one morning into , where was confined by the gout , and expostulated very warmly with upon this subject .
asked what reasons , more than a mere wandering inclination , had for leaving and , where might be well introduced , and had a prospect of raising fortune by application and industry , with a life of ease and pleasure .
told it was who went abroad upon adventures , to rise by enterprise , and make famous in undertakings of a nature out of the common road ; that these things were all either too far above or too far below ; that mine was the middle state , or what might be called the upper station of low life , which had found , by long experience , was the best state in , the most suited to human happiness , not exposed to the miseries and hardships , the labour and sufferings of , and not embarrassed with the pride , luxury , ambition , and envy of .
told might judge of the happiness of this state by this one thing — viz .
that this was the state of life which envied ; that have frequently lamented the miserable consequence of being born to great things , and wished had been placed in the middle of the two extremes , between the mean and the great ; that gave testimony to this , as the standard of felicity , when prayed to have neither poverty nor riches .
bade observe it , and should always find that the calamities of life were shared among , but that had the fewest disasters , and was not exposed to so many vicissitudes as ; nay , were not subjected to so many distempers and uneasinesses , either of body or mind , as , bring distemper upon by the natural consequences of way of living ; that the middle station of life was calculated for all kind of virtue and all kind of enjoyments ; that peace and plenty were the handmaids of a middle fortune ; that temperance , moderation , quietness , health , society , all agreeable diversions , and all desirable pleasures , were the blessings attending the middle station of life ; that this way went silently and smoothly through , and comfortably out of , not embarrassed with the labours of the hands or of the head , not sold to a life of slavery for daily bread , nor harassed with perplexed circumstances , which rob the soul of peace and the body of rest , nor enraged with the passion of envy , or the secret burning lust of ambition for great things ; but , in easy circumstances , sliding gently through , and sensibly tasting the sweets of living , without the bitter ; feeling that are happy , and learning by every day ’s experience to know more sensibly .
After this pressed earnestly , and in the most affectionate manner , not to play , nor to precipitate into miseries which nature , and the station of life was born in , seemed to have provided against ; that was under no necessity of seeking bread ; that would do well for , and endeavour to enter fairly into the station of life which had just been recommending to ; and that if was not very easy and happy in , it must be mere fate or fault that must hinder it ; and that should have nothing to answer for , having thus discharged duty in warning against measures which knew would be to hurt ; in a word , that as would do very kind things for if would stay and settle at as directed , so would not have so much hand in misfortunes as to give any encouragement to go away ; and to close all , told had , to whom had used the same earnest persuasions to keep from going into wars , but could not prevail , young desires prompting to run into the army , where was killed ; and though said would not cease to pray for , yet would venture to say to , that if did take this foolish step , would not bless , and should have leisure hereafter to reflect upon having neglected counsel when there might be none to assist in recovery .
observed in this last part of discourse , which was truly prophetic , though suppose did not know it to be so — say , observed the tears run down face very plentifully , especially when spoke of : and that when spoke of having leisure to repent , and none to assist , was so moved that broke off the discourse , and told heart was so full could say no more to .
was sincerely affected with this discourse , and , indeed , who could be otherwise ?
and resolved not to think of going abroad any more , but to settle at according to ’s desire .
But alas !
a few days wore it all off ; and , in short , to prevent any of ’s further importunities , in a few weeks after resolved to run quite away from .
However , did not act quite so hastily as the first heat of resolution prompted ; but took at a time when thought a little more pleasant than ordinary , and told that thoughts were so entirely bent upon seeing that should never settle to anything with resolution enough to go through with it , and had better give consent than force to go without it ; that was now eighteen years old , which was too late to go apprentice to a trade or clerk to ; that was sure if did should never serve out time , but should certainly run away from before time was out , and go to ; and if would speak to to let go one voyage abroad , if came again , and did not like it , would go no more ; and would promise , by a double diligence , to recover the time that had lost .
This put into a great passion ; told knew it would be to no purpose to speak to upon any such subject ; that knew too well what was interest to give consent to anything so much for hurt ; and that wondered how could think of any such thing after the discourse had had with , and such kind and tender expressions as knew had used to ; and that , in short , if would ruin , there was no help for ; but might depend should never have consent to it ; that for part would not have so much hand in destruction ; and should never have it to say that was willing when was not .
Though refused to move it to , yet heard afterwards that reported all the discourse to , and that , after showing a great concern at it , said to , with a sigh , “ might be happy if would stay at ; but if goes abroad , will be : can give no consent to it . ”
It was not till almost a year after this that broke loose , though , in the meantime , continued obstinately deaf to all proposals of settling to business , and frequently expostulated with and about being so positively determined against what knew inclinations prompted to .
But being one day at , where went casually , and without any purpose of making an elopement at that time ; but , say , being , and , and prompting to go with with the common allurement of , that it should cost nothing for passage , consulted neither nor any more , nor so much as sent word of it ; but leaving to hear of it as might , without asking ’s blessing or ’s , without any consideration of circumstances or consequences , and in an ill hour , knows , on the 1st of September 1651 , went on board a ship bound for .
Never ’s misfortunes , believe , began sooner , or continued longer than mine .
was no sooner out of than the wind began to blow and to rise in a most frightful manner ; and , as had never been at before , was most inexpressibly sick in body and terrified in mind .
began now seriously to reflect upon what had done , and how justly was overtaken by the judgment of for wicked leaving , and abandoning duty .
All the good counsels of , ’s tears and ’s entreaties , came now fresh into mind ; and conscience , which was not yet come to the pitch of hardness to which it has since , reproached with the contempt of advice , and the breach of duty to and .